Proverbs 31

VIRTUOUS PROVERBS 31 MAN AND WOMAN

By Norma Daulton


"Her husband is known in the gates;When he sits among the elders of the land." Proverbs 31:23

First to understand the scripture "He is known at the gates" we must take a look back in Bible times. In Bible times most cities were walled and fortified for protection against the enemy. Of course these cities had gates for entrance and exit. These gated entrances had rooms within them. Most had a water supply of some type, places to build fires and stairwells leading up to the top of the wall. These rooms inside of the gates were set side for the daily works of the city government, deliberations and of course the room where the guards stood watch.

We see from the second part of this verse that her husband "sits among the elders of the land" this tells us he is a reputable man and contributes to public life. He is obviously a man of influence within the city. Whatever position this man held it was one of prestige, well known and well looked upon. His position could have very well been that of a civic leader in today's society equal to a city councilmen, lawyer etc. It could also have been a leader in the religious establishment of that day.

The Virtuous Woman and Man of Proverbs 31 compliment each other in their own unique roles in the home, in the community and in the Church. As Ecclesiastes 4:9 states: "Two are better than one, Because they have a good reward for their labor." Two working together to fulfill their divine destiny in the Lord can be a powerful team.

COMPARISON OF THE PROVERBS 31 WOMAN AND MAN.

* The Christian man is happy and confident in his role as the head of the home and in the work place.

* He is a man of common sense and wisdom.

* His employment is within the city, serving the people.

* He has earned honor and respect for his work.

* He is known for his good character.

* The Proverbs 31 Woman is also happy and confident in her role as a Christian Woman, Wife, Mother, and Keeper of the Home.

* She is a gentle, kind and soft spoken woman of great wisdom.

* She serves the people in her household with great love and stretches out in charity to others outside her household when time permits.

* She is respected by her husband for her resourcefulness and creativity. She is respected by her maids and sisters in the Body of Christ.

* She is known for her impeccable character.

* She surrounds her "head" (husband) with prayer and is respectful and gives honor to her husband's role as head of the home. "A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband." Proverbs 12:4


Today's society has for the most part lost the appreciation for the old saying "behind every good man is a woman". When looking at some of the Spiritual leaders today and yesterday years History reveals that wives have always been a gentle but strong force behind her husband.

Reading stories of D.L. Moody and his ministry I have been moved by the fact that he said after hearing his wife pray with their children that he knew that he could go on to his next preaching assignment with confidence that she could and would indeed hold down the fort, keep the home-fires burning and keep the Godly focus in their home while he was away.

Warren Wiersbe (Back to the Bible speaker and teacher) had this to say about his wife Betty. "She is a help meet in the truest sense, the mother of four children, budget balancer, mechanic and 'jack of all trades'. Our ministry has been a team effort and I couldn't have wanted a more understand and dependable partner". Quote from Power for Living 1/16/2000

What awesome blessings these and other Christian women are to their husband's. We, my dear Sister, can be a blessing to our husbands as we fulfill our divine role as a Woman, Wife and Mother. To do so, we must rise against the grain of modern day liberals and delight in our roles as Proverbs 31 Women. We must not be ashamed to say that we are Christian Women who are happily fulfilling our divinely appointed destiny.

Today many woman are encouraged to be their own person at any cost..."make something of themselves in the world." If a woman chooses to stay at home instead of working outside the home she is considered "out of the flow of things". Women who choose to stay at home are often looked down on as lazy, unproductive, uneducated. Not so! Some of the Christian ladies I have shared with in Bible Studies and Church meetings are college graduates... but they have chosen to use their talents in the home.

I have heard Christian friends say that they could not wait to get a job and get away from the 'humdrum of housekeeping'. When finances are an issue and mothers have to leave the home to work, it is a whole different issue and both husband and wife can stay the course by working together to keep their family values intact and the home running smoothly. But when women seek to leave home, not because of financial needs but just to get away and find out "who they are" something is amiss in their thinking.

Let me pause to say that I do not want any woman to feel condemned if she is currently working outside the home. God's perfect plan for each of us is in the home, but there are so many circumstances that lead some to work outside the home. May none of us be guilty of pointing the finger at any woman who is not a stay at home mom.

I worked for 30 years after many attempts to bear a child and when I was finally told I would never have a child my husband and I agreed upon my receiving training that would enable me to qualify for a post in an elementary school as an administrative assistant.

When my husband was transferred to another state after 30 years of service with his company I gave up that high paying position that I had grown to love and followed my husband and became a stay at home woman... later when he was called to an Evangelistic Outreach I served alongside him until he retired from secular employment and from the ministry.

My desire, and I hope yours, is to be a blessing to our husbands and children in a godly fashion. God desires that we count our role as Wife, Mother and Keeper of the Home as one of high priority, respectable, honorable, our Divine Destiny and do it with all our strength, mind and body as unto the Lord.

Things to ponder regarding being a blessing to your husband

1. Encourage your husband, find the strengths he has and focus on them.

Proverbs 3:27 Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due, When it is in the power of your hand to do so.

2. Praise your husbands and appreciate the small things.

Proverbs 12:25 Anxiety in the heart of man causes depression, But a good word makes it glad.

3. Take care of your home. Your home is a reflection of you as you are a reflection of your husband.

4. Take care of your marriage. It is a fact that love and marriage take a lot of elbow grease and effort.

5. Take care of yourself. Keep your appearance up. Funny how we don't mind doing ourselves up for a special occasion---Make everyday a special occasion!

6. PRAY for your husband. He needs you to be a Prayer Warrior. Ladies, we are to circle our *head* with prayers.

7. Respect your husband.

Ephesians 5:33 Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

8. Be a good reflection of your husband, protect and preserve his reputation as well as your own.

1 Timothy 3:4 one who rules his own house well, having his children in submission with all reverence

3:5 for if a man does not know how to rule his own house, how will he take care of the church of God?